Aral Balkan

ArseArs Technica have photos from the Moscone Center ahead of MacWorld on Tuesday where you can clearly see the message "2008 There's something in the air". I guess you know as well as I do what that means.

Yes, my friends, it's as good as official:

Apple is going to be releasing flying MacBook Pros (dubbed the MacBook Pro iFly) on Tuesday.

The iFlies are expected to relieve geeks of the physical pressures of carrying around their notebooks which will henceforth follow them around.

AralBalkan.com can also reveal that Steve Jobs is expected to announce the immediate availability of the new flying MacBook Pros by releasing a flock of them on stage at the end of the keynote.

It all makes sense. We've all been expecting the MacBook Pro line to get a radical overhaul this year. While Apple was busy spreading misinformation about an ultra-slim notebook they were secretly putting the finishing touches on the new MacBook Pro's dilithium crystal-powered nano warp drives. Insiders close to Apple have revealed that although the new notebooks are theoretically capable of Warp 9 speed, Apple will be artificially clamping speeds at Warp 1 for the initial run. We have, however, learned that Philip Torrone and his elite Make ninjas are close to perfecting a trans-dimensional time machine which they plan to use to go back in time, hack the new MacBook Pros before release to remove the restriction and create the world's first pre-hacked product release in the process (good luck guys!)

Several industry analysts that we spoke to predicted that we should grow accustomed to seeing flocks of MacBook Pros flying over major cities and an almost permanent spectre of circling notebooks should be expected to circle local Starbucks stores and university campuses.

The Mac rumor community will no doubt be completely blindsided by this latest development and I expect MacRumors.com, TUAW, etc. will be linking to this post within minutes of it going live (losers! pwned!)

Comments

• You forgot to Photoshop the wide touch pad area below the keyboard for use in gesturing.

  by ericd on 2008-01-11 21:07:06

• @Hofa: Apple apparently doesn't recommend riding their computers, citing overheating issues that could adversely affect critical anatomical features.

  by Aral on 2008-01-11 21:07:31

• @ericd: Wide touch pad area? On a notebook? Sounds like a science fiction fantasy to me!

  by Aral on 2008-01-11 21:08:22

• Funny stuff! Just what I needed. But how about some WinUsers jumping off the MacBooks with WinLogo Parallelachutes? It reminds me a little of the cover illustration for Douglas Adams' So Long and Thanks For All the Fish. Maybe the Macs have been trying to tell us something. I've added your Singularity badge to my blog; email sent. Peace.

  by Tim Kissane on 2008-01-12 06:10:51

• Is this a response to Microsoft's flying toasters? Apple always do it better ;)

  by Jungle on 2008-01-13 18:08:18

• You're a genius... this is awesome. Dugg.

  by Casey McKinnon on 2008-01-14 01:29:46

• I cannot wait... they will go 5x further than if you try to throw a MacBook Pro now! I can imagine at the keynote throwing them into the audience at rapid speeds while he has a crazy eyed drool face. It will be glorious... Glad I bought my stock now.

  by Joey Primiani on 2008-01-14 04:04:28

• The reflections are all wrong. Definitely photoshopped.

  by Jono on 2008-01-14 09:35:39

• [...] on the heals of our previous expose, we've received an exclusive photo from today's MacWorld keynote rehearsal at the Moscone Center [...]

  by Exclusive MacWorld Rehearsal Pic Reveals Real Bombshell at Aral Balkan on 2008-01-14 19:49:25

• opposite of funny = this blog

  by bork dander on 2008-01-18 05:28:19

• I don't think this is true? How can a computer fly?

  by John on 2008-02-18 18:35:13

• http://mbp12.com

  by pb12 on 2008-01-23 21:55:53

• Will it be possible to 'ride' the mac-books?

  by Hofa on 2008-01-11 21:05:19

• 'Blindsighted' would seem a bit oxymoronic unless you happen to be Daredevil : ) Here in the States we say "blindsided" when someone gets hit with something that they didn't see coming (due, it is assumed, to it's having been in their "blind spot.") Is it a typo or a British-ism? (or, dare I say, a poke at some of the Mac-zealotry you got a taste of when you were miffed at your keyboard's random freezes awhile back?)

  by cynic on 2008-01-12 01:43:38

• I wonder if you'll need a flying license to use those. Do you get a free parachute when buying one? I know Macs usually don't crash, but you know how it goes: Safety first (sounds a lot like Durex). Anyway: You might need some sleep, Aral :p

  by Ronny on 2008-01-12 04:37:32

• @cynic: Blindsided, indeed! :) Thanks for catching it.

  by Aral on 2008-01-12 11:17:58

• Wow, I'm really impressed! Can't wait till tuesday to see them get launched!

  by Tino Klumpen on 2008-01-11 21:25:56

• thank you! this is the best post Ihave read all day. I'm not sure whats the matter but you might need some sleep! I guess the pier hasn't changed there shipping schedule yet!

  by corban baxter on 2008-01-11 22:07:45

• btw - i tried to digg this for $h!ts and giggles and digg says your url doens't work. wordpress issue?

  by corban baxter on 2008-01-11 22:10:51

• hi will it be announced today wether the new macbook pro is released?

  by jag on 2008-02-12 09:28:46

• Joking aside, the first thing I thought of when I saw the Moscone Center banners was an eventual ad campaign with the new MacBook Nano "flapping" its keyboard and tablet-reversible screen through the air. Then I dismissed the idea as silly, but perhaps it's not..

  by Peter Cooper on 2008-01-13 11:27:56

• [...] but according to Brighton based “internet junkie” Aral Balkan, that something is a flying MacBook Pro. It all makes sense. We’ve all been expecting the MacBook Pro line to get a radical overhaul [...]

  by Flying MacBook Pro To Be Announced at Macworld | Laughing Squid on 2008-01-14 04:32:25

• Ive just seen a flock of MPB's attacking a poor helples Acer, the Dell and the Ibm ran off as soon as they appeared. It seems they were getting really close and then melting it from the sheer power of their VGA's (Veryhot Grey Areas).

  by Ray on 2008-01-15 02:28:23

• Lol. I for one would like to see the Flying Toasers screen saver come back - but with flying Macbooks! Now THAT would be cool!

  by Macbook pro on 2008-06-01 07:26:07

• Hmmm. I like the post, but it's a bit subjective to be honest. Not that my opinion matters :) Keep posting!

  by Mac dude on 2009-02-20 23:10:51